by Cheta Nwanze

The good news, if such a thing is possible in such circumstances, is that what happened in Lagos, was one of our sadly routine tanker explosions, and not a bomb as previously thought.

While addicts such as myself suspended all activity to enjoy the latest instalment of Nigeria’s thrillers with Argentina, evil men continued what they do best and dispatched at least 37 of our fellow citizens to the afterlife in both Abuja and in Borno. In Lagos at the same time, an explosion in Apapa sent another four citizens in the same direction. The good news, if such a thing is possible in such circumstances, is that what happened in Lagos, was one of our sadly routine tanker explosions, and not a bomb as previously thought.

While praying for the repose of the dead, we must spare a thought for some of our military pensioners who felt the need to show up at the venue of the National Jaw-jaw to demand their pension arrears, and demand for better treatment. It is particularly tragic that after spending three and a half decades of their lives, in some cases, serving our national interest, they are then left to rot.

But leaving things to rot is a national pastime in this, err, geographical expression, which is why the 144 who were let go yesterday must give thanks. You see, in this nation of one day, one trouble, some of us are too busy watching the World Cup, others have moved on to the next trouble, and well, 20 of the released, have been replaced.

Bits and Bobs
Forget a seemingly incompetent security apparatus, a seemingly more efficient force is at work in Sambisa as poisonous creatures are making life difficult for #BokoHaram out there.

In Bayelsa, a 9-year old who can’t be named for legal reasons took a playground quarrel personal, and ended it with a knife.
Was it fibroids or a baby? Doctors weren’t sure. After 9 months, Mercy guessed it was the former. After 14 years, the baby popped out.

For those of you in Lagos wondering why you are using your gen-sets more, here is why.

Right of Reply
Joe Abuku wrote,

Sorry I was unable to respond to yesterday’s tonic. No thanks to some tight demands.
You got your hierarchical set up in Fatherland wrong.
Let me help you out
Prez is No.1
Veep, next in rank
Big Gavel, takes bronze
Forget Small Gavel. His ranking exists only on paper. In reality, he’s seen as an outsider, rogue legislator
In his place is the Petroleum Dame. Sometimes she even beats Veep to the aces.
So Small gavel insists on embarrassing the Pet. Dame with an inquest over a paltry 10 billion jet expenditure, she simply puts a call to Prez, Prez calls his over fed army chief to “do something”, army chief calls his boys at 1 Div and requests a favour. Your guess is as good as mine what that favour is.
Hope I’m not sinking into conspiracy theories
Have a great day. Messi isn’t given me no heart attack

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Op-ed pieces and contributions are the opinions of the writers only and do not represent the opinions of Y!/YNaija.